Cyberbullying

If you are a parent of a child who is on-line, then it is important that you understand the issue of cyberbullying.  It is a new form of bullying through cyber channels and it is on the rise.  What is Cyberbullying?

Cyberbullying is a modern twist on traditional bullying. Cyberbullying is defined as use of the Internet, cell phones, or other devices to send or post text or images intended to hurt or embarrass another person. Cyberbullying includes such things as sending malicious emails, spreading rumors or threats, and posting embarrassing or intimate photos of a person—sometimes altered—without their permission. Frequently, the audience is enormous. And what lives in cyberspace can never be fully erased. (1)

The National Crime Prevention Council (NCPC) estimates that as many as 43% of all teenagers online experienced some form of cyberbullying during a one year period.

When you give your child their first cell phone or allow them to start social networking, it is important that you teach them the rules of the road.  You wouldn’t toss your child your car keys simply because it is their 16th birthday, and you shouldn’t let them go online without providing guidance on how they should handle online activities.  You need to teach them about cyberspace and how to avoid some of its pitfalls, before they go online.

For example, if your child wants a Facebook account, get familiar with the website.  Either set up an account to learn about it, or find an adult friend you know who is on facebook and ask them to show you how it works.  Please note that Facebook and MySpace have strong policies against children under 13 signing up. 

Then, once you are familiar with the tool, sit down with your child and set up the child’s account together.  Set all the privacy settings so you both understand them, and make them as tight as they can be. 

Assure your child that they can have privacy with what they do on facebook, but they should feel comfortable coming to you if something happens that makes them upset or uncomfortable.  You won’t judge or close the account, but rather help them solve the issue.

The following text was extracted from an article on NCPC.org containing great tips for both kids and parents:

What Kids Need to Know

• Never give out personal information online, whether in instant message profiles, chat rooms, blogs, or personal websites.
• Never tell anyone but your parents your password, even friends.
• If someone sends a mean or threatening message, don't respond. Save it or print it out and show it to an adult.
• Never open emails from someone you don't know or from someone you know is a bully.
• Don't put anything online that you wouldn't want your classmates to see, even in email.
• Don't send messages when you're angry. Before clicking "send," ask yourself how you would feel if received the message.
• Help kids who are bullied online by not joining in and showing bullying messages to an adult.
• Always be as polite online as you are in person.

What Parents Can Do:

• Keep your home computer is a busy area of your house.
• Set up email and chat accounts with your children. Make sure that you know their screen names and passwords and that they don't include any personal information in their online profiles.
• Regularly go over their instant messenger "buddy list" with them. Ask who each person is and how your children know him or her.
• Print this list of commonly used acronyms in instant messenger and chat rooms from the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children and post it by your computer.
• Discuss cyberbullying with your children and ask if they have ever experienced it or seen it happen to someone.
• Tell your children that you won't blame them if they are cyberbullied. Emphasize that you won't take away their computer privileges - this is the main reason kids don't tell adults when they are cyberbullied.

You can read the following articles for further information:

• Stop Cyberbullying Before It Starts
• Cyberbulling FAQ for Teens

If you arm your child with good defensive skills, they can have a great experience on the internet.  Happy Surfing!

- contributed by Katie Ayres, Belmont Web Committee Chair

(1) NCPC: 21st Century Bullying, Crueler Than Ever